Do I Qualify as a S W A G??

Raquel Welch - Aged Woman


I just read a review of a book called "SWAG - Southern Women Aging Gracefully". Does living in Georgia for almost 11 years mean that I am no longer a Pennsylvania- born Yankee? Or since I lived in California for 22 years am I considered, as Randy, a friend of Pat's once said, a native of the land of "fruits and nuts"? More importantly - what is the secret of aging gracefully anyway? I suspect I am not doing that. Aging gracefully implies to me that I should have a couldn't-care-less attitude about the multitude of changes happening in and around my body. Knees lock up? No big deal. Buddha-like stomach following four births and 49 years of yo-yo diets? No big deal. Toenails as hard as walrus tusks? C'est La Vie!

Where are the role models for Aging Gracefully? Raquel Welch is in my age bracket but I sure don't look like HER! I look at clothes catalogs which flood our mailbox and I say to myself- "That's cute" ~ but then I wonder - is that cute for someone MY age? Or appropriate? So, much like the book that stated When I Am An Old Woman I Will Wear Purple - I am stocking up on all kinds of purple stuff. I will slather on the Olay, avoid trying on swimming suits in dressing rooms with the three-joined-together mirrors, take my Omega-3's, and perfect my Bare Minerals Makeup applications. If on some occasion you see me wearing an outfit that belongs on someone younger - and you don't like it - well then - as a SWAG would say - Kiss My Grits!